Gifting Guilt

Going through things I am always faced with the decision of what to do with what I no longer want in my possession.  I find it easier to say, "yup done with this, not going to need it" than deciding what should happen next. Once some version of that thought has been tied to an object it is classified as clutter, something taking up space and energy that is unnecessary.  The options seem to be:

1. Gifting to others via family, word of moth social media, free cycle, etc.

2.Selling on eBay, craigslist, offered, etc.

2. Donating to charities, churches, shelters, fundraisers, etc

3. Landfilling

4. Hoarding

Our excess tends to accumulate guilt.  Hopefully the object was something that you loved and was super useful when you bought it. Maybe it was not, and the guilt was there from the start, you knew it should not enter your home, or maybe the guilt was there, because although you loved it you knew that you could not afford it!  I have this guilt from the start with some things.  I also have guilt with things that I needed, loved and used, and was perhaps even a gift. Generally this guilt only sets in after the item is in disuse.  I will see it and feel guilty i can no longer use it, it is worn out or outgrown.  Then I feel guilty that it is still taking up my family space and energy and often the time spent cleaning and organizing all of this stuff.

My first thought, especially with nicer items is to gift them.  I like knowing the the item will be used by someone, that i might save them money, or make them happy.  There is some science that gifting is quite beneficial to the gifter as well.  Yet  perhaps, it brings more guilt at times too.  I had recently donated the nail polish my daughters no longer use.  They did a small research paper on the effects of nail polish and decided it was not for them.  They had an extensive collection, at first I thought that we might use it for crafts, but no we have not.  So I posted it on FB, and within a few minutes a friend responded enthusiastically, and i got a wonderful visit!  But I felt guilty, yet didn't want to be the friend spouting health info. obviously she knew that i was getting rid of all of our expensive polish because we didn't want to use it...she is smart and can make her own decisions....and already was buying her own polish, so still better to keep it out of landfill, and from more being produced.  It brought back a memory of getting some children craft things from a free cycler.  I was thrilled, she was cleaning out and just kept handing me more.  Her 15 y.o. daughter came out and started being upset with her mom, upset that her mom was foisting off all of her clutter on to me LOL!  She said I would end up in the same position as her mother. At the time I didn't see it at all.  Now I do, that 15 y.o. had more wisdom than either of us!  A week later I brought some of the supplies to a preschool.  But just 2 days ago i donated 15 pounds of those crayons, 10 years later!!!!!

Selling is a lovely thought.   A little money back to ease the pain of having wasted your precious hard earned dollar.  You will quickly find that stuff generally does not sell quickly at all.  There are a few exceptions, price things like bicycles or cars at half of used value and they will be gone super quick.  But the majority of what you are selling, will just find you spend a lot of time posting and storing.  Add to that the frustration of dealing with meeting up with strangers, and long back and forth, they will want it for even less than posted, and maybe they won't even show up...

Donating is most people's solid fall back option.  Beware, that just because you donate does not mean it will not end up in a landfill!  Go into a thriftshop, there are far more clothes than shoppers.  You are almost as likely to see workers removing clothes/goods that have been too long as putting out new.  More and more you will find that donation centers are handing goods back to you at the door, stuff they know will not sell, and they don't want to take on the liability of throwing it away. I know that the clothes are sold as rag bundles, but often these ultimately end up its the trash.

That brings us to Landfilling, yup tossing it in the bin!  For some items this is the only choice, unless it is made of recyclable materials. Then there is guilt if it has to be thrown away because honestly, if you donate that blender that would cost more to fix than replace, you should feel guilty that the charity will just have to pay to throw it away for you.  For some people this is the only way out.  Yes the item could be washed, but there is so much it won't happen, or they don't have the resources to get themselves to donation centers (some will collect if you are close enough!) And often the reason you stopped using it was because it could no longer be used.

Brings me back to gifting to someone you know will use it, the benefit is triple, you get a boost as a gifter, they get a free item, and they are not stoking the consumer market buying a new one!  A lot of what you no longer want no one else wants/needs either! Be a conscious consumer, it will simplify your life by not ever having to make all these decisions.  When you buy that tchotchke at the dollar store, will you feel guilty when it comes time to pass it on, even thought it only cost you $1? When you give that gift, be it something you are passing on or a new holiday gift, will you feel guilty every time you see it filling someone else's space?

Composting Slippers : Shoe Clean Out

Shoe Cubbies after Reducing

We had too many shoes by the door!  An understatement, considering my dh built me a shoe cubby with 5 slots for each of us.  Once again I forgot to take a before picture.

We found 4 pairs of summer shoes, that we put in a bin in the closet.  Then we found 1 pair of boots with a busted zipper, they were pretty used looking, so while they were probably repairable, but I do not have the funds to repair, and they were on the cusp of being outgrown.  If I had donated them they would throw them away.  So with some angst I did dispose of them.  I thought of offering on freecycle, however, it is unlikely that someone would be willing to put the $ into having them repaired.  I have tried selling new, unworn children's Ecco shoes for $15 and had no luck!  I would snap them up if I had a child that size, but people around here must feel that it is too much, and people willing to pay for quality just buy them new for $80 I guess. Also, I am in the process of trying to give away 2 gallons of good ceiling paint.  I have had at least 10 inquiries, but the pick up coordination is truly discouraging.

These are the shoes that left, except the Mary Janes, they were repaired

I repaired two of the pairs of shoes my older daughter outgrew so my younger can wear them.  The Wool slippers are from the wool of local sheep.  I had spun it into yarn and used Kool-Aid to dye it.  My son had worn a hole in the toe.  My daughter asked me to repair for her, but she has 3 pairs of usable slippers.  So I chose to compost these!!!

The little Ecco hiking boots will hopefully find some happy feet to take hiking.  My husband asked how I made it look so tidy!  My take-away from this is that I intend to buy no more slippers with plastic soles, I intend to make them compostable, wool slippers each year for Christmas.

Now if only I could find a place to recycle the incandescent bulbs that were here when we bought the house and are suddenly burning out all together.  It seems that locally I can only recycle the CFLs.  We are changing over to CFLs as the old ones burn out, and these can be recycled at Lowe's, Target, Home Depot, or Whole Foods, etc.

If you are trying to locate a place to recycle locally Earth911 is a great place to start.

Purging Kitchen Utensil Drawer

Utensils before

So I was browsing my posts this morning, and had a thought about my Making Space! post.  I realized that the project was started due to the utensil drawer being jam packed, yet I only removed the one slider press from the drawer.  I have admit, that did the trick.  I have been able to use the drawer without an real issues, it now shuts.


It occurs to me in reflection, a definite bonus of keeping this blog, that the drawer could stand a good going-through.  As I sit thinking of it though, I am telling myself that everything else belongs there.  And that I do use it all...sort of.  Even the cork screw, there is a story there.

Corkscrew

We have disposed of at least 3 cork screws in our married life.  We would be doing a clean-out and be on a roll, then we come across the corkscrew and say "oh, that can be donated!"  Then a month down the road, someone would bring a bottle of wine to dinner, or we would come up with some other utilitarian use for a corkscrew.  Now, life has always provided a means, and we have been able to procure a new corkscrew. There was no need to feel regret over the decision to let go of it.  Yet, I feel like buying the new corkscrew is wasteful, and inconvenient.

It is this sort of situation that leaves one feeling like we should just hold onto anything that is useful, as we may need it one day.  Balancing seems to be the answer.  We need to balance the amount of things that we keep with the amount of space we have.  Karen Kingston states in one of her books that we need to believe that life will provide what we need...yet there are many starving people in our world...so maybe these are just really words said, not believed--for valid reason!  Of course this is all the more reason to know that we do not need all the 'stuff', and to consider our real needs.

In balancing it is necessary to consider the priority of the space we have and the items we choose to keep.  If you won so many things that you cannot find them when you need them...Then you are wasting the space, and your time looking,  perhaps keeping them from going to a home where they will be used rather than that other person creating demand for another item from 'overseas', and in the end how many times have you replaced the item, just to then add it to the storage where the duplicate is already lost?

Coming back to the question at hand, the corkscrew.

After

1. PRIORITY OF SPACE  the corkscrew is in the utensil drawer, prime real estate, for items that should be used everday--or at least weakly, at worst once a month.  The corkscrew fits none of those.  I think we have used it 2 times in the 6 years we have lived here.  And there are other things that we do use that belong here.  Having more space in the drawer would make access to used items much easier.
2. PRIORITY OF ITEM:  it is used, but very infrequently.  If I were moving overseas I would not bring it, or even think of it.
3. IS THERE AN ALTERNATIVE?:  While i have needed it, is there something else I could use, or even a duplicate?  Actually, while writing I have come up with the perfect solution.  We have a jackknife somewhere that has a corkscrew.  The plan is to write the task of finding the knife down, and not worry about it.  When I come across the knife, we will find it an appropriate home and donate our LAST corkscrew!  

duplicates

 And now that I have worked this through I believe that I will be able to apply it to other items that cross my path, at least I hope so :)  And maybe that jackknife (when i find it) will stand in for at least a few other things too!

 Donations

I have now made a difference in the drawer although the picture does it no justice.  Look how you can actually see the bottom of the drawer!  Some utensils I had duplicates for.   Isn't the mouse grater fun,  I kept hem, but the smaller hand held grater and the turn-handle grater both left.  I kept the large hole grater, as we use it most often.  I love the idea of the hand-crank beaters, but they are so hard to use the kids really cannot do it, and neither can I.  Since i have the electric mixer, there is no need to keep an unused utensil for idealism!  This reminds me, i have an electric hand-mixer under the counter that i never use...

Making Space!

I tackled another kitchen cabinet!  I went to get the cork screw this morning (to pull a rubber stopper from the cod liver oil)  and realized somehow our utensil drawer had become jam packed.  One look and I knew there were at least a few things that did not belong there.  Right on top was my husband's slider press.  Silly, yes, perhaps...he could use his hands to shape, and not this tool. BUT it makes him tremendously happy (just like the Legos my kids do not need), and he does use it frequently.  So for now it stays.  This is a process that everyone needs to be happy going through.

I figured i would just find it a new home, JUST?!  I could find no happy home.  Something had to go!  At first glance I saw nothing obvious to leave.  In fact, I thought I had done a pretty good job maintaining the kitchen stuff.  Not so.  I found this cabinet, and i set to work :)

I found a great Vitamix on vacation last year, and so the Osterizer has sat dormant ever since.  For Now--those fateful words, this will go to the camper and take the recently vacated place of the waffle maker.  We did really enjoy having smoothies while on vacation-they are simple, quick and nutritious.  Not sure if this one is up to the task, but if I am using it, and it drives me crazy I will be motivated to get rid of it.  Then I will just take our Vitamix with us, a bit of a hassle, but worth it.  I also found a new Oster lid that doesn't even fit this model!  I set it aside for a friend who has one that it might fit.

I gave the Brita Filter to my grandparents, I hope it turns out useful to them.  We have been using the more expensive fridge filter because it is there, saves space, and saves spills, also we drink a LOT more water that way.  Not sure about the waste issue with the filters....wonder if they could be recycled?  Or at least backwashed for reuse.  They do last a long time, and make a huge difference in our water taste.  At any rate I no longer needed the pitcher.

The 4 brown bowls are now in the donate box.  I do have a friend that has a similar set, but not sure if I will get them to her, which ever happens first is where they will go.  I also have a table cloth that makes me think of that same friend, and so I grabbed it out of my linen closet and threw it in with the dishes, it will either finally make it to her or not with the dishes---oh, it would make a good skirt though....

I would love to get rid of the Parafin Spa for hand wax....but the kids and their friends love it.  I recently refilled it--i know it is not a good step in waste reduction to use this product--but I bought the wax a year ago.  I will donate when this wax is all used up.  Maybe it will at least keep someone else from buying a new unit.  For the moment we will enjoy this gift from my grandparents (my grandfather's therapist thought it would help him with the pain in his hands, but he did not like it).

Well it felt like a lot more when I was doing it...but still I cleared off one whole shelf's worth of things in the process of finding a place for a 2"x4" by 2" tall slider press!!!