Today was another good day, but perhaps not spectacular...or maybe it was! I may be on the 'not good enough' treadmill. I really want to just be done! I want to succeed at my goal to live a clutter free life, with less time spent cleaning and organizing and more time doing the things that really matter. I want to walk into my home and think, yes! I'm home, I can relax; rather than oh my gosh! I have so much work to do.
At the end of the day I have not reached that goal. In fact I am not even feeling like I'm half way there. And, so I think I have failed again. But this mindset will not help anything. And I have had a productive day. I was reading, somewhere, that I need to take account of my accomplishments. Rather than worrying about what I did not get done, I need to give myself credit for what I did do. In this way I can create a growing sense of success, that will spur even more success. It certainly sounds better than dwelling on the negative lack, and letting that drag me down to giving up.
Each day I will challenge myself to write a post about what I did that day. I will hopefully be able to use the practice to figure out how my actions can contribute to my overall goals. Perhaps I will even be able to start appreciating that which simply makes me happy, and not feel guilty that it was not more. After all, if the purpose of my end goal is to be happier because I have less clutter, then being happy on the journey is the ultimate success!!!
We collected all of the recycles and trash, and brought them to the transfer station. This included the grill cover that was disintegrating in the sun (we are deciding on the grill, still serviceable but we have not really grilled since we went vegan, although I really love grilled veggies and want to try pizza on the grill especially in the heat). Then we literally filled the dinette area in the camper with donations to take to the church my mother donates to, it was about 12 bags. We dropped a kids desk off at my brothers for his daughter. Then we gave the laundry drawers to my mother, and dropped a laundry basket of clothing off at friends house for her daughter!
After that the kids vacuumed my mothers van while my husband took my father, who recently had a heart attack, to buy some lumber. An hour drive home, and we made some cookies and pizza while my son and I (I directed, while my son used his young muscles) weeded the back side of the house. Last week we finally admitted we had not used the hot tub in 6 years and gave it away. We turned it off when I had to have all of my surgeries and never turned it back on.
With the weeding half done my son noticed how dirty the back of the house had become. He grabbed the hose and a broom and was trying to clean it. It needed a little more help, especially higher up. So we purchased some mildew cleaner and they sprayed it down. It looks new again! while at the Home Improvement store, I almost wanted to buy a power washer, fortunately they did not have a 'good' for a reasonable cost, and I think that in the end, while it may have done a better job, we got it 90% done without spending or having to store more equipment.
At the end of the night we sat in bed and started talking about what the house would need in order to sell. Inspired and wanting to accomplish more I dumped my bedside table drawer on the bed. About half of what was there was removed, thrown away, put away or put to donate! I found a mess of gift cards that I will make a point of actually using if purchases must be made :)
So the house is not zen, it's not even tidy. We did have a good, productive and meaningful day. We helped others and made our house a little better. I am looking forward to doing more tomorrow.